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I am just feeling so bummed out. Losing Deeva yesterday has really devastated me, and I cannot seem to shake it. I know it takes time, but I just can't stop crying!!! Every time Rowan is asleep or in the other room, the waterworks start again. Then I wipe my face and put a smile on, like I am somehow tricking him! He knows, and I need to get it together PRONTO!!! God, I just miss her SO MUCH! Pet lovers, dog owners, you know where I am coming from. Deeva was a gift from my husband when he went to Iraq the first time, in 2005. She was also the niece of our beloved Gucci (passed in 2004). My Yorkies are like my children; they go everywhere with me! It was wonderful being in Germany, b/c pets are allowed EVERYWHERE, and we took advantage of it! She went sight seeing with us all the time. Our Army friends LOVED Deeva, she kind of became our little mascot! LOL Every time Jamie and I went somewhere, several people would offer to watch her for us. She was VERY much loved!!! She is was our little sweetheart, and she loved everyone she ever met...

OKAY, I can't talk about it anymore...
I am still upset about the house. I have no more options at this point. I have looked at every house in our price range within a 20 mile radius!!!! I am out of options...I am stressed...I WANT A FREAKING HOUSE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am sad, I am mad, I am agitated, I miss Jamie and I miss our Deevers.... God, PLEASE let things turn around for us soon. I really cannot handle all of this!!!!!!!!!!!!